[there is comfort in the way sam pulls her close, allows her for a moment to be vulnerable without urging her to force on this façade of someone who's got it all under control. it's been unbelievably hard, and as much as talking about westview and everything adjacent to it might help, it's the kind of weight that when spoken about just buries deeper and deeper.
she is afraid, too. she's lost so many, so much; everyone she loves has died or is gone in some capacity. she does not wish this upon the world, and it frightens her to go through this all over again—of not being able to experience any of it again, because nothing will compare. she misses her conversations with vision, his touch; she misses pietro's jokes and stubbornness, and how he knew to comfort her without having to say a word—holding her in an embrace, holding her hand; she misses the way her parents would hug her and kiss the top of her head; she misses tommy and billy, their arms wrapped around her waist, calling her mom—choosing her to be their mom.
wanda takes a deep breath as sam pulls away, but she remains close, holding onto the hem of his shirt.]
I know.
[she echoes him, but she does know: about his priorities, about not being an avenger anymore (that ended the moment tony died, didn't it?), and she knows about keeping safe.]
I just— [with a shaky breath, wanda tries composing herself. her voice is not that shaky anymore, and though her eyes are glossy with emotion, she rubs at them to dry her cheeks.] There's something I want to do, and I think this place can help me do it. There's so much magic, and... and I'm learning more.
[she smiles lightly, looking up at sam, letting go of his shirt.]
I've made a friend, I think. Her name's Himeka. I'm staying with her in a farm.
[ there is a part of sam that doesn't really want to let go - if only for the fact the loss feels so real, so new. he holds tight to wanda for those moments just to let her be, and even when he does pull away it isn't very far. close enough that he barely notices the way she is still holding onto the hem of his shirt.
it hurts, of course it hurts, but the pain of it is sharp and fresh seeing wanda trying to work through it. i know she says, and sam just feels...what. useless? powerless? lost, at the simple way he's not even entirely sure what he can do to help, at this point?
his head tilts a bit as she starts to speak, the mention of something she wants to do and how this place can help easing at least a little bit of that worry away from him. ] There's a lot of magic, yeah, and a lot of people here who know how to use it. And I might not be much help in that arena, but you do know if you need anything you just ask, right? I'm just a c- [ sam cuts himself off from there, about to say call, before he huffs a sort of laugh. ] Well, I guess it's a weird brain message, but you can reach me whenever.
[ sam only really notices that wanda had been holding on to him when she lets go, and it pushes him to kind of resent. not necessarily away from her, really, but just in general. to listen. ]
Himeka... wait. I met her a bit ago. She's been around a while, right?
[the all-time reliable sam. wanda knows this, but she also knows that, given his nature, he is likely to be spreading himself thin with helping everyone. the amount of people she's met who know him is quite vast already, and she would hate to take up much of his time.
even with their history, even with being from the same world; the last thing she wants is to burden him. he is everyone's captain america, and it's not like she can be selfish.
but she will keep in touch, because sam is her friend. she might not want to burden him with her troubles, but she can at least appease his worries.]
From the very start, sounds like. When everyone was summoned into Thorne and some were thrown into the dungeons. [all of that is incredible suspicious, if anyone asked for her opinion. but, it's not about that, their meeting here. instead—] I want you to know that I'll be okay in Solvunn. It's quiet, and the people there are nice. Himeka is incredible nice, too, so I won't... be alone.
[because, as her friend, wanda doesn't want sam to worry for her in the in-betweens of conversations and horizon meetings.]
[ there is a whole mess here that sam would argue with, but the spread thin reality isn't far from the truth. it's always been in his nature to keep busy, to find something to fight, and to run off to look for it if it doesn't end up in his back yard. but that also doesn't cut short the amount he does mean it. how, at this moment, wanda really is the one who has known him the longest back home. the one who knows more of him, as sam wilson the avenger, than anyone else. because he might be everyone's captain america, but he is also just sam with her.
and for all that he may worry about her, too, he does know she can take care of herself. has seen it first hand, and then with all he's read up on about westview... he nods, confirming, because yes. himeka was there that first group, was down in the dungeons with geralt. sam takes another breath and gives her a small smile. ]
I'm glad. You shouldn't have to be alone. [ he means that with his whole chest - wanda, and all the people she's lost. the family they both have. he nods, once more, and then sits up again. ]
Sorry to derail that. [ since he'd been the one to ask about her running off to sokovia. about the cabin. he knows the reason thy came here was to talk about goro, so sam's tone shifts. ] But- Goro. [ a beat, a breath, and then he continues. ] I do know him. I had a run-in with him in his Horizon. He's someone I've been trying to keep my eye on.
[reassurances is all they can give each other for now, see how things pan out and test their limitations. sam will be fine, even if she knows he'll definitely exert himself more than necessary. wanda may need more support in the end, but she feels alright, she's keeping her mind busy.
—but the topic at hand, goro.
wanda scrunches her nose a little, leaning back.]
He came to Solvunn a few days ago. I'm not sure if he found what he wanted, but — I don't like him. Tried to imply something big was being kept from the newly arrived.
[she makes a face and exhales sharply.]
I'm wrapping him up in my powers and throwing him back to the Free Cities next time he steps into the settlement. [no fucks]
[ for all the seriousness of the earlier conversation, sam brings up goro and wanda scrunches her nose and it almost feels...normal. which he knows is such a cheap way to describe it, but it is. he huffs a laugh, runs his hands across his face. ]
As much as I would love to see you chuck him across the countryside, I'd watch it with that one. He's... [ there are flashes of faces that come across sam's memory, people he would compare goro to, if given the chance, but in realizing wanda probably wouldn't half the politicians, he kind of lets it go in a breath. ] Dangerous. And I don't mean physically or magically or whatever- you could definitely kick his ass. I just mean...
[ sam gestures, taking a moment to find the words, to see if there's a quicker way to explain this. ]
The Free Cities has this thing with magic. They don't trust it- not like home, not like that. It's more that they think science is more dependable. But you know how easily distrust like that can snowball... [ sam suddenly feels like he's mainsplaining, in the worst possible way. of course wanda knows what he's talking about. she's lived as the scapegoat for this exact same thing for years now. so sam redirects. ]
Goro's trying to capitalize on that. See- a few months ago we had this...thing happen. No one really knows what caused it, or what happened exactly, but... [ he sighs. ] Ghosts started showing up in each of the factions, and people started to panic. [ which...god, this really is their life now, isn't it? ghosts and magic and things of fairy tales. but wanda knows what sam means when he says that, what the tone means when he says 'panic'. it hadn't been pretty. ] When it came out later that it was from Solvunn - some mages who messed something up, I don't know, but people started talking, and a lot of those people were Goro and his goonies.
[ things have slowed down a bit since then, sam thinks. but he knows no part of it has gone away. ]
[wanda had heard about this from multiple people, had brought it up in conversation with others. it had, for all intents and purposes, appeared as a gross misconduct on behalf of solvunn—enough for it to be brought up during the summit, enough to warrant an apology.
it sits strangely with her, but she listens to sam continue on explaining the situation. he's lived through this, she remembers.]
Sounds like everyone has to watch their six around him.
[alas, if only she knew how bound she would become to goro in the future.]
Isn't it weird, though? Solvunn seems to be the one least concerned with whatever direct competition The Cities and Thorne are in. Why — would they do something like that? It doesn't make much sense to me.
[ he doesn't know how much she's been told, or what. the longer he remains on abraxas the more aware of the politics he's becoming. the way stories, the way events, can be spun. it's not far from what goro's done with the people of cadens, but there's also not much sam can do about it.
for now, though, he just watches wanda listen. watches her take in all this information and work with it how she will. and god, if sam had any idea what was ahead of them, maybe he would have said something else. maybe he would have tried hard to say something more. for now...for now, he just trusts her. her opinion, her questions, where she wants to fit into all of this. it's all he can do. ]
I don't think they were doing anything. [ sam shrugs, looks down at the mug in his hands. ] Us being here is proof that the mages and whatnot here are messing with magic they don't really understand. And I think Eifstide was just that - people messing with magic and something big happening because of it. [ a beat, and then a sigh. ] Between you and me, I don't think anyone in Solvunn wants this war, but they're in a tough spot, and if they're not careful, make a great scapegoat. And Goro sees that.
That's what I thought, too. I talked about it with Stephen, and he agrees— the slightest wrong turn in a spell and it can unfurl into something out of control, even for the mages casting it in the first place.
[they must have found a way to balance out what is needed for the summoning spell, then, almost to perfection, if all three factions can manage it without much of everything going wrong.
she frowns for a moment, looking away.
solvunn can make a great scapegoat and goro sees it. perhaps many others see it this way, too. it is hard to tell where they stand when they don't have all the cards at their disposal to make sense of them.]
All this, and it is somehow less complicated than back home. [wry humor, but is she wrong? a passing glance at sam.] Nothing for it but to trust those around us and be ready for anything, right?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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she is afraid, too. she's lost so many, so much; everyone she loves has died or is gone in some capacity. she does not wish this upon the world, and it frightens her to go through this all over again—of not being able to experience any of it again, because nothing will compare. she misses her conversations with vision, his touch; she misses pietro's jokes and stubbornness, and how he knew to comfort her without having to say a word—holding her in an embrace, holding her hand; she misses the way her parents would hug her and kiss the top of her head; she misses tommy and billy, their arms wrapped around her waist, calling her mom—choosing her to be their mom.
wanda takes a deep breath as sam pulls away, but she remains close, holding onto the hem of his shirt.]
I know.
[she echoes him, but she does know: about his priorities, about not being an avenger anymore (that ended the moment tony died, didn't it?), and she knows about keeping safe.]
I just— [with a shaky breath, wanda tries composing herself. her voice is not that shaky anymore, and though her eyes are glossy with emotion, she rubs at them to dry her cheeks.] There's something I want to do, and I think this place can help me do it. There's so much magic, and... and I'm learning more.
[she smiles lightly, looking up at sam, letting go of his shirt.]
I've made a friend, I think. Her name's Himeka. I'm staying with her in a farm.
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it hurts, of course it hurts, but the pain of it is sharp and fresh seeing wanda trying to work through it. i know she says, and sam just feels...what. useless? powerless? lost, at the simple way he's not even entirely sure what he can do to help, at this point?
his head tilts a bit as she starts to speak, the mention of something she wants to do and how this place can help easing at least a little bit of that worry away from him. ] There's a lot of magic, yeah, and a lot of people here who know how to use it. And I might not be much help in that arena, but you do know if you need anything you just ask, right? I'm just a c- [ sam cuts himself off from there, about to say call, before he huffs a sort of laugh. ] Well, I guess it's a weird brain message, but you can reach me whenever.
[ sam only really notices that wanda had been holding on to him when she lets go, and it pushes him to kind of resent. not necessarily away from her, really, but just in general. to listen. ]
Himeka... wait. I met her a bit ago. She's been around a while, right?
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even with their history, even with being from the same world; the last thing she wants is to burden him. he is everyone's captain america, and it's not like she can be selfish.
but she will keep in touch, because sam is her friend. she might not want to burden him with her troubles, but she can at least appease his worries.]
From the very start, sounds like. When everyone was summoned into Thorne and some were thrown into the dungeons. [all of that is incredible suspicious, if anyone asked for her opinion. but, it's not about that, their meeting here. instead—] I want you to know that I'll be okay in Solvunn. It's quiet, and the people there are nice. Himeka is incredible nice, too, so I won't... be alone.
[because, as her friend, wanda doesn't want sam to worry for her in the in-betweens of conversations and horizon meetings.]
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and for all that he may worry about her, too, he does know she can take care of herself. has seen it first hand, and then with all he's read up on about westview... he nods, confirming, because yes. himeka was there that first group, was down in the dungeons with geralt. sam takes another breath and gives her a small smile. ]
I'm glad. You shouldn't have to be alone. [ he means that with his whole chest - wanda, and all the people she's lost. the family they both have. he nods, once more, and then sits up again. ]
Sorry to derail that. [ since he'd been the one to ask about her running off to sokovia. about the cabin. he knows the reason thy came here was to talk about goro, so sam's tone shifts. ] But- Goro. [ a beat, a breath, and then he continues. ] I do know him. I had a run-in with him in his Horizon. He's someone I've been trying to keep my eye on.
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—but the topic at hand, goro.
wanda scrunches her nose a little, leaning back.]
He came to Solvunn a few days ago. I'm not sure if he found what he wanted, but — I don't like him. Tried to imply something big was being kept from the newly arrived.
[she makes a face and exhales sharply.]
I'm wrapping him up in my powers and throwing him back to the Free Cities next time he steps into the settlement. [no fucks]
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As much as I would love to see you chuck him across the countryside, I'd watch it with that one. He's... [ there are flashes of faces that come across sam's memory, people he would compare goro to, if given the chance, but in realizing wanda probably wouldn't half the politicians, he kind of lets it go in a breath. ] Dangerous. And I don't mean physically or magically or whatever- you could definitely kick his ass. I just mean...
[ sam gestures, taking a moment to find the words, to see if there's a quicker way to explain this. ]
The Free Cities has this thing with magic. They don't trust it- not like home, not like that. It's more that they think science is more dependable. But you know how easily distrust like that can snowball... [ sam suddenly feels like he's mainsplaining, in the worst possible way. of course wanda knows what he's talking about. she's lived as the scapegoat for this exact same thing for years now. so sam redirects. ]
Goro's trying to capitalize on that. See- a few months ago we had this...thing happen. No one really knows what caused it, or what happened exactly, but... [ he sighs. ] Ghosts started showing up in each of the factions, and people started to panic. [ which...god, this really is their life now, isn't it? ghosts and magic and things of fairy tales. but wanda knows what sam means when he says that, what the tone means when he says 'panic'. it hadn't been pretty. ] When it came out later that it was from Solvunn - some mages who messed something up, I don't know, but people started talking, and a lot of those people were Goro and his goonies.
[ things have slowed down a bit since then, sam thinks. but he knows no part of it has gone away. ]
Just...be careful around him, okay?
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[wanda had heard about this from multiple people, had brought it up in conversation with others. it had, for all intents and purposes, appeared as a gross misconduct on behalf of solvunn—enough for it to be brought up during the summit, enough to warrant an apology.
it sits strangely with her, but she listens to sam continue on explaining the situation. he's lived through this, she remembers.]
Sounds like everyone has to watch their six around him.
[alas, if only she knew how bound she would become to goro in the future.]
Isn't it weird, though? Solvunn seems to be the one least concerned with whatever direct competition The Cities and Thorne are in. Why — would they do something like that? It doesn't make much sense to me.
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[ he doesn't know how much she's been told, or what. the longer he remains on abraxas the more aware of the politics he's becoming. the way stories, the way events, can be spun. it's not far from what goro's done with the people of cadens, but there's also not much sam can do about it.
for now, though, he just watches wanda listen. watches her take in all this information and work with it how she will. and god, if sam had any idea what was ahead of them, maybe he would have said something else. maybe he would have tried hard to say something more. for now...for now, he just trusts her. her opinion, her questions, where she wants to fit into all of this. it's all he can do. ]
I don't think they were doing anything. [ sam shrugs, looks down at the mug in his hands. ] Us being here is proof that the mages and whatnot here are messing with magic they don't really understand. And I think Eifstide was just that - people messing with magic and something big happening because of it. [ a beat, and then a sigh. ] Between you and me, I don't think anyone in Solvunn wants this war, but they're in a tough spot, and if they're not careful, make a great scapegoat. And Goro sees that.
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[they must have found a way to balance out what is needed for the summoning spell, then, almost to perfection, if all three factions can manage it without much of everything going wrong.
she frowns for a moment, looking away.
solvunn can make a great scapegoat and goro sees it. perhaps many others see it this way, too. it is hard to tell where they stand when they don't have all the cards at their disposal to make sense of them.]
All this, and it is somehow less complicated than back home. [wry humor, but is she wrong? a passing glance at sam.] Nothing for it but to trust those around us and be ready for anything, right?